Intercon! (or, larps and me, redux)

PART ONE OF TWO

Some of you may recall an earlier post of mine where I talked about my previous larp experience (limited, and not terribly positive), and my conflicted feelings about trying to get into the scene in more recent times.  As many of y'all recommended, I decided to throw myself into the deep end of the pool, and go to Intercon this past weekend, where I ended up doing four (out of a scheduled five) larps over the course of 36 hours.  Whew!

I had a lot of feelings over the course of the weekend -- a few of my fears were actualized, and a lot of my hopes.  There were moments I loved, and moments where I almost started crying (while playing a five-year-old, no less).  Lots happened.  So in this post, the big picture thoughts.  In the next, comments on my specific games and what I thought about them.

So I should say at the outset what I keep trying to remind myself:  I'm actually really proud of the fact that I threw myself into a set of vulnerable situations, where I had to act silly/sexy/afraid/cool/confused/amnesiac/guilty/etc. etc. etc. in front of a whole bunch of people I didn't know well or didn't know at all.  This was definitely a boundary-stretching experience, and challenged my introverted / socially-awkward-and-shy-at-parties-with-strangers type tendencies quite a lot.  I used a lot of energy over the weekend, and in fact eventually plum ran out (as described in part 2).  But I think I did a good job at participating as fully as I could.

It was a good experience in terms of one of my main goals -- jumping in and trying things out while attempting not to get hung up on my self-consciousness or inhibitions.  I even volunteered for Karaoke Powerpoint as a warmup, to get used to being a little silly in front of others (:  It was fun to do, and very fun to watch others come up with some truly inspired interpretations of the slides.  In the majority of my games, I threw myself into characters (or negotiations or plot or puzzles) with a fair amount of gusto.  I tried hard on costuming and studying my character sheets, which helped.  I thought out a lot of situations prior to games, imagining things I might do or say, and trying to create additional backstory or mischief or color.  This had varying degrees of effectiveness -- when it worked, it was tremendously fun for me.  When it failed miserably, I sometimes had a bit of trouble recovering. 

From the outset, I found the app process to be really rewarding, especially after writing that earlier post and thinking a whole lot about the things I did and didn't expect to like.  It felt good to be able to be honest and specific about my needs and wishes, and it was especially satisfying when that seemed to pan out into characters which lacked my main concerns (largely, of feeling disconnected, and of having to just act mopey or melancholy). 

One of my other big goals was trying to get to know more people in usernamenumber's scene, where I often feel a little fish-out-of-water, because I know relatively few peeps, and people at parties tend to talk a lot about larping and past larps, and I end up having trouble relating.  They all (slash you all) seem like a group of good people, but it's been a little tough for introvert non-larper me to make much by way of inroads into the community.  And... I think I made some really important headway and first steps, though not at all in the way I expected.  I met lots and lots of people in a "This is preraphaelite!" "This is person X!" "Hi preraph!" "Hi X!" kind of way, which didn't really get much farther than that.  I also met lots and lots of people in a fictional way (in game), which was by and large really really nice, though I'm left with this very odd sense that I'm not sure whether I met *them* or *their character* or *both*.  Aside from official post-game discussion, I didn't really get to socialize after games with the other players, which was a bit of a shame.  I had essentially one (tremendously pleasant!) relaxed hangy-outy conversation which actually involved getting to know a couple of people out of a game, Sunday morning.  But.  I now have reference points for and some familiarity with a lot more people in the scene than before, which is really nice, and I hope will be something to build on in the future.  I still struggled a lot over the weekend with being a newbie, and people talking around me about shared experiences that I... didn't share, but that's something to work on over time. 

So generally speaking, it was fun!  Some games I loved and some I hated, but in ways that would probably allow me to do some filtering in the future.  I was nervous about the whole thing, and suffered a little from the wandering-aimlessly syndrome I've been known to have at parties, but generally, my characters had enough goals and action that those periods were kept to a minimum and I had a lot of people to talk to and things to do.

Things I've learned I like:
1) Intense emotions and "thriller" type stress.
2) Flirty/charming banter, innuendo
3) Manufacturing subplots by making up stories (in-character) and seeding them to other characters in devious ways
4) Giddy simple fun -- being chased, nerf-shooting someone, trying to steal a ball from another "kid"
5) Being a little evil
6) Having a lot of connections to my character
7) Being part of a little team (I really liked being a bound-together sibling pair, and being part of a political faction with some solid allies)
8) Romance with cute boys
9) Puzzles puzzles puzzles!!! (My first sudoku was in a larp!  Who knew?)
10) A good endgame explanation/discussion of all the things -- closure and payoff
11) Being well-prepared.  It made all the difference.
12) Games with decor or props or other things that made the situation more real.
13) Dramatic physical gestures -- dropping to my knees, a big pointing move at someone. (also the tiny physical gestures -- I found I really really enjoyed the little moments of touch.  there was a moment of holding hands that actually made my heart flutter in my chest)

Things I have trouble with, or don't like
1) I cannot for the life of me non-awkwardly end a conversation!  Must work on this.
2) PAPER.  I hated games which forced me to hold an unreasonably large stack of paper. -- relatedly,
3) Mechanics which get in the way of roleplay and interaction.  See my next post for more on this, but I don't think I'm ever playing another MIT game.
4) I need to work on my impulse to be passive in conversations sometimes.  I know I can overcome this, but I'm by default much more a listener than a talker in groups.
5) Remaining in character while doing things that are thinky
6) I want to be a better actress!  I'm sure practice and familiarity will help.
7) Sometimes I had trouble breaking out of the more obvious tracks of character-sheet or plotline based conversation.  I'd love to find a way to have more of the small moments of realistic character talk that are unrelated to goals.
8) Must. Stop. Wandering. Aimlessly.  Sometimes I need to just bite the bullet and make decisions rather than dithering.

Next post: Reviews and recaps!